Nene's Not so Sure
by Imaj Inaya
Summary: Nene POV... post galatea. Shojoai esc.


The clock says it's tweenty till. That's tweenty minutes of me stareing at the cursor blinking on the screen. I've only been stareing at it blink away for the last two hours! Tweenty more minutes are nothing, but why am I so stressed out? It's just a date for a couple of friends, there's nothing there. Why won't my mind shut up? Why can't I find the words to type in my journal? I'm starting to creep myself out, I'm not into girls- I know that.  
  
I really felt hopeless, I mean, the world was about to end and it was up to just the three of us to stop it. Macky gave everything for me, and I felt truely awaken, and older. I've never loved anyone the way I love him, there's no question about it. But why am I having these strange feelings? Why do I want... no. No I don't, and what am I thinking? Ten minutes now. I remember how she came to my rescue, she always does. She kept my mind steady, she gave me the drive I needed right then... with her arms tightly wrapped around my body. I'm just lucky to have such a careing friend I guess. We made it out, we did it.  
  
It's time. Why am I so nervous? Where is she? She's not the type to be late... but why should I care? This cursor is still blinking, and I'm not moving. It's all because of that night. That's what it is. Why did I allow myself to do such a thing? It's not like I kissed her or anything, but still... I was naked, she was naked. It just felt so good to have her arms around me like that. I know she likes girls, and it was like letting her... letting her get close to me. I'm not gay. I'm really not.  
  
She finnaly showed up, and I remove myself from my chair. Answering the door I see her, dressed in her usual casual outfit. She doesn't look awkward, maybe she hadn't thought anything of it. Maybe I have nothign to worry about. I grab my stuff and I'm gone, out on our date for friends. It's not unusual, we used to do it all the time. So why not have a good time?  
  
"Nene? You okay?" She asks. We're sitting at a restraunt table, and I must be spacing off again. I've been spaceing off alot since the incident.  
  
"Yeah I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" I laugh nervously as cheerfully as possible, then quickly turned the tables on her, "Are you telling me you're still sore from that last battle?" She blushes, as I knew she would. I'm still sore too, but I won't say it. hehe.   
  
"Yeah, well... whatever" She grumbles, "It just looked liek soemthign was on your mind. hmph."  
  
"Did Leon-poo ever find Priss? He asked me about her a couple days ago..." I decided upon a change of subject.  
  
She sighed, trying to keep a steady face. She wanted to be so strong even though everyone knew she had a huuuuuge crush on Priss. "Yeah, looks like things are pretty serious now. Think they'll be getting married? heh?"  
  
"Priss? Married?" The idea was so out there I couldn't help but laugh at Linna. She blushed again.   
  
"Yeah... It would be pretty wierd." Linna said timidly.  
  
"What about you?" I asked. I hadn't meant to throw it out there so bluntly, but it just came out. Oh well, at least I'd get soem answers.   
  
"What?" She was still blushing, "What do I have to do with anything?"  
  
"With Priss silly. We all know you're head of heels for her" I said cockily, placeing my hchin on my hand and giving her a cat smirk.  
  
"Ah, uh... Whatever gave you all that idea?" She chuckled nervously.  
  
"Oh come on Linna... " I rolled my eyes.  
  
"I don't know... I guess everyone has been paired off, I'll just have to meet someone new... or be the odd one out. Nothing really new, I guess. " She shrugged and looked down at her coffee.   
  
It was that feeling again. I was being pulled to tell her that I wanted to help, how did I want to help? It was insane, I had Macky, I love Macky. I kept my mouth shut, it's all for the best. There wasn't too much more to the conversation. We walked home, Linna was depressed, but hidding it rather well. I wanted to tell her, I wanted to get these horrible thoughts on my mind off, but no. It's not going to happen, and I wanted to kiss her. It was the first time in my life I've ever wanted to kiss a girl, but I didn't. I watched her walk away. I would go in. I would go to that blinker, and I would find the words to say that I may not be as straight as I'm sure that I am. I may not be, but you know what? My journal is the only one that will ver know that. Ever.  
  
~The End~ 


End file.
